April 14, 2016

The Man Next Door Is Teaching His Dog to Drive



The Man Next Door Is Teaching His Dog to Drive
by Cathryn Essinger from My Dog Does Not Read Plato.


It all began when he came out one morning
and found the dog waiting for him behind the wheel.
He thought she looked pretty good sitting there,

so he started taking her into town with him
just so she could get a feel for the road.
They have made a few turns through the field,

him sitting beside her, his foot on the accelerator,
her muzzle on the wheel. Now they are practicing
going up and down the lane with him whispering

encouragement in her silky ear. She is a handsome
dog with long ears and a speckled muzzle and he
is a good teacher. Now my wife, Millie, he says,

she was always too timid on the road, but don't you
be afraid to let people know that you are there.

The dog seems to be thinking about this seriously.

Braking, however, is still a problem, but he is building
a mouthpiece which he hopes to attach to the steering
column, and when he upgrades to one of those new

Sports Utility Vehicles with the remote ignition device,
he will have solved the key and the lock problem.
Although he has not yet let her drive into town,

he thinks she will be ready sometime next month,
and when his eyes get bad and her hip dysplasia
gets worse, he thinks this will come in real handy. 


Thanks for stopping by and sharing my life with me,

April 10, 2016

How to Play Night Baseball



"How to Play Night Baseball" 
by Jonathan Holden from Design for a House


A pasture is best, freshly
mown so that by the time a grounder's
plowed through all that chewed, spit-out
grass to reach you, the ball
will be bruised with green kisses. Start
in the evening. Come
with a bad sunburn and smelling of chlorine,
water still crackling in your ears.
Play until the ball is khaki—
a movable piece of the twilight—
the girls' bare arms in the bleachers are pale,
and heat lightning jumps in the west. Play
until you can only see pop-ups,
and routine grounders get lost in
the sweet grass for extra bases. 


Thanks for stopping by and sharing my life with me,

April 3, 2016

The Well Bread Dog by John Hegley



The Well Bread Dog by John Hegley

One evening John came home from work
went into the kitchen to make himself a nice cup of tea
and on the kitchen table, in a plastic bag,
he discovered a large sliced loaf
with one of the crusts missing

Actually it was a very large sliced loaf,
about the size of a rabbit hutch,
and John, who lived very much alone,
knew that he hadn't put it there and wondered who had.

Just then there was a rap-a-tap-tap at the front door.
It was John's new next-door-neighbour.

"Excuse me barging in", she said,
"but you haven't seen my dog have you?".

"What does it look like?", inquired John concernedly.

"Like a large sliced loaf", replied the neighbour.

"With one of the crusts missing?", asked John.

"Yes", replied the neighbour, "she had a fight".

John smiled, went out into the kitchen,
and returned with the mysterious loaf.

"Is this her by any chance?" he asked.

And the neighbour said,
"No".

I hope you laughed at the end!
Thanks for stopping by and sharing my life with me,

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