November 26, 2013

Tuesday Humor

A short list of things you should know about flies.

1. Flies rarely carry handbags. This has nothing to do with their weight or the fact they could get in the way of their wings, but everything to do with the fact that flies get paid in shamrocks which they clip to their toes with hair slides, therefore rendering any handbag/purse type object useless, and a waste of shamrocks.

2. Flies can only eat one piece of sweetcorn a year, or else they implode.

3. Flies are a little bit scared of the actor Robert Downey Junior. It is something to do with his eyebrows.

4. Flies do not believe in goats. If they see a goat they pretend they haven’t as other flies will think they are mad and avoid them.

What does Cherry Tucker have to do with a goat? Find out in STILL LIFE IN BRUNSWICK STEW!

5. Flies can only count to seven and have to say the word ‘periscope’ after each number.

Flies also have an unexplained passion for anything by Tom Jones but can’t stand Val Doonican

Flies also cannot play hopscotch. It’s against their religion.

Flies are also horrible spellers, needing to google almost everything they have to spell. this doesn’t really work, as google has no idea what ‘ffudsiaop’ is, so it says ‘did you mean ‘ffudsiag’?’ which, of course, they never do.

Thanks for stopping by and sharing my life with me,

1 comment

Thank you for commenting! I enjoy replying to all comments that have an email address attached. If you are not on Blogger please include an email address within your comment--then I can say hi back!